Excerpt from the novel, The Republican Professor

By Lucas Mather

The professor entered the back door of the classroom and floated down to the front, taking in the 40 or so students shifting about, getting settled, and said, hi, I’m your professor.

I know that when you hear the word “hi,” given that it’s California, you don’t know if I’m describing the way I feel, or if it’s a greeting, the professor said.

There were some chuckles.

Welcome to Logic, he began. I assume you have the textbook.

The students looked at each other, making attempts at digging in bags for note taking material. A handful held up the textbook.

Normal people say “great,” here, he continued . But I’m going to say, not great.

A student raised her hand. She said, some professors don’t actually use the books ordered in the bookstore all that much. I wanted to be sure it was needed before I buy it, she said, and many groaned in agreement.

Ah, yes, that makes sense, the professor said, to their satisfaction. It’s still not great, however, he noted.

Why not? the student said.

Do you know what the word “great” means? the professor asked.

Um, well, it’s just something people say, like.

I don’t say it unless I mean it, the professor said. There’s nothing great about having the textbook. A fortiori, there’s certainly nothing great about not having it. In the absence of greatness, I’m permitted to say, not great, he said.

But it’s not bad, though, she said.

The absence of bad is logically consistent with the absence of greatness, true, the professor noted, writing “logically consistent” on the board.

This would be a good place to begin the first lecture, he said. If those of you who have the book would turn to page one, and allow others to look on if possible, let’s take a look at the definition of logic, he said. Definitions of terms are very important in this class, and in life. I expect you to memorize the bold-faced terms and any other terms I reference as important in class lecture, the professor said.

And he taught the first class.

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This has been an excerpt from The Republican Professor: A Novel by Lucas Mather