Professor, RU a Christian B4 Your a Republican ?

It's A Good Time to Discuss the Lighthouse

Professor, RU a Christian B4 your a Republican ?

I think so.

And your a Christian before your an American, right ?

No, that’s incorrect.

Well if your a Christian you shud be a Christian first before anything else.

But that’s not how this thing worked out in real life. Hardly ever does, if ever, the professor said.

Well that’s how it shud be, tho, the student said. She was chewing gum.

But that’s now how it works in the real world, the professor said, once again.

How does it work, then ?, the student said, blowing a bubble.

I began a finite time ago, the professor said, in the past, he added in response to the furrowed brow of the student. [The repetition did nothing to remove the furrow].

I became alive, not that I was dead before, but that I wasn’t at all, the moment before, the professor continued. Coextensive with that moment, I was extended in a body, in space and time, a human body. That occurred, as far as I know by the ordinary methods of knowing, in this case a combination of expert testimony and memory and of course sense perception (being able to see and hear the testimony goes a long way toward being able to recall it correctly later) in the United States.

Huh?, the student said.

What tripped you up just then ?

Oh, um. Expert testimony ?

Parents are experts in this regard. And , background knowledge of how pregnancy happens is supplemented to some extent by experts.

But if you were not born you didn’t take up space.

Tell that to any pregnant woman, the professor said.

Oh, I mean, like at the beginning.

Very small things still take up space, the professor said.

The student’s eyes went up and to the left, then gradually, moved right along the crown moulding on the where the wall of the classroom meets the ceiling, and the student belched, oh yeah.

So this was in the United States, shall I continue ?

Sure, the student said distantly.

But the United States policy toward small unborn human beings did not regard me as a citizen, because in order to do so, that same policy would have to have regarded me as a person as a logically prior condition, or a metaphysically prior condition.

But, the professor added quickly, I consider myself an American at the time, though , because I think the policy was flawed, the professor said. A sufficient condition for being a citizen, though, given that both my parents were citizens and subject to the jurisdiction thereof for purposes of the 14th Amendment, and given that I was born in one of the states, was that at the moment of birth, I was a citizen, though still not a person according to some pro-choice understandings of the time—predominantly Democrat understandings.

[The student stopped chewing].

Now, at that moment, I reached a sufficient condition, as granted for the sake of argument by even the policy of the United States, for being an American. But I was just a baby, an infant.

[The student slowly began chewing again].

This occurred before any change in status to Christian or Republican. I was neither at the time because those conditions require one to have mental processes of the kind that make one a Christian, make one a Republican.

The student said but, but then trailed off.

The professor patiently paused, then continued: I became a human first. I’m alive and human at the same time. So I am an alive human first, a living human, then an American, because these things in the real world do not require any mental processing abilities in terms of beliefs or attitudes. Then, later I became a Christian as a child, and shortly thereafter, I became a Republican. But there are some people who become Republicans first, then Christians later.

The student said, I didn’t mean first in terms of , how you call it ?

Temporal succession ? the professor asked.

Yeah, I just meant like first like first, like, you know, like.

What other way is “first” meant ? the professor asked.

Like, you know, like, priority. Like.

What do you mean by “priority”? the professor asked.

Like, importance.

They’re all important, aren’t they ?

Well, I guess so, but like being a Christian is like heaven or hell importance. Are you one of those heaven or hell Christians ?

I’m not sure what you mean . There’s many kinds of Christians ?

Well, the student laughed, I mean, you believe that people who aren’t Christians go to hell and Christians go to heaven. Right. Like one of those biblical ones.

The proper understanding of a thing is key to understanding the thing—that seems tautologous, the professor said.

[The student furrowed a brow again].

If you’re comparing Christians with non-Christians, but in doing so sound like you’re distinguishing one type of Christian with another type of real Christian, that’s like asking if you’re one of them Koran-type Muslims or a Book of Mormon kind of Muslim—there are no Book of Mormon kind of Muslims.

I see, the student said.

It’d be like asking if you’re one of them real Americans, or one of them who have no American parents, born outside the United States, like in China, subject to the jurisdiction of China kind of Americans. That’s not a comparison with types of real Americans—that’s a comparison of real Americans from non-Americans.

Okay.

So, I was a living human first, American second, Christian third, and Republican last.

But which one is more important ?

They all pertain to different things. They are all important. But living human came first, American second, Christian third, Republican last. For me. Others have a different order for the stuff that comes after living human.

Oh, like my uncle, who was born in China, but became an American citizen, and he was a…I actually think he became a Republican and then a Christian.

That’s a good example.

You know what a lighthouse is, the professor said, after a pause.

A what ?

A lighthouse, the professor repeated.

No.

It’s a house on the shore with a tower and a light that shines out to the ships and boats on the sea, letting them know where the shore is.

Cool.

Yes, it’s a very important thing to know where one thing ends and another begins. It doesn’t mean that land is more important than the sea. They are different. One has to keep in mind the differences in getting along in the world. A lighthouse can help.

I think I understand.

If you think being a Christian is more important than being a Republican, you may not understand what you’re saying. Important for what ? Being Republican is a way of navigating on land, for example, the land of the political. One needs political understanding, otherwise you’re sailing your boat right onto the shore, and all that happens there is that you crash, and all that because you didn’t pay attention to the lighthouse. You understood that the sea was “more important,” so you ignored the differences in the real world and didn’t account for them in the realm of political understanding, which allows you to get around on dry land.

The student threw away the piece of gum, and said, are we gonna have a quiz next week ?

The professor said, I tell you what. I’ll pray about it.

[The student sighed].

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This has been an excerpt of the novel The Republican Professor, by Lucas Mather